Book 18 Chapter 6

Men falling on their heads

-Hoo-doo-doo!

Leaning against the railing of the moon pavilion and gazing into the distance, Na Yerin's eyes traveled back in time, looking into the past. A gray time when everything lost its color.

* * *

The world through the eyes of a young girl was a faded ash color.

From an early age-even before the signs of womanhood began to appear on her body-Na Yerin was at risk. Half the world was a threat to her, because half the world was, unfortunately, male. This may seem very obvious and unimportant, but it was a very serious problem for her, because for some reason, men of all professions and ages would take one look at this young girl and fall in love with her. Not all of them, but most of the men who lacked self-control. It wasn't a physical attraction, but some unknown attraction from a realm beyond the flesh that captured the men's souls for a fleeting moment. The unfortunate thing was that she had never, not once, wanted to have that ability.

What does it matter if they're young? That's an irresponsible statement that's out of touch with reality. The reality is much more chilling and perverted. If you think you're safe because you're young, because you're naive, you're underestimating the wildness and perversity of the male race. This was a world of diversity, and there was as much negative diversity as there was positive diversity. After all, diversity is a collection of different things.

This exposed her to serious threats, and in order to protect her from the males who wanted to have her - in more ways than one - her father, the martial artist Nabaxian, decided to send his daughter to study at the Sword Pavilion, a place reserved for women only. The fact that her father was so determined to send her to a place where she wouldn't see him for years is a pretty good indication of the gravity of her situation. To add insult to injury, when he parted ways with his daughter, Bai Chen burst into tears, earning the ire of Gum Hu. After that incident, his visits to Gum Hu for "business" became more frequent. This annoyed him greatly.

"Protect your body, Meng Zhu!

That was a habit of his every time he met Bai Xiaochun.

But even with the arrangements in place, the threat was not completely gone. The physical threat was greatly reduced, but the mental danger remained.

Dragon eyes!

By this time, her mind was already being consumed by too much power for her still young vessel. What happens to a young mind that is confronted head-on with the most tainted thoughts that seek to defile it? It's no wonder she slams all the doors to her mind shut; it's a young girl's almost instinctive defense for survival.

"…that's the one!"

"Oh, my dad said I was a martial artist……."

"But why did such a precious house, such as Tiankei, come to this backwater South Sea?"

"Well, word on the street is that you've been dealing with kidnapping threats and a host of other threats, so why don't you go to……."

"Gosh, that's so manly, honey, so nothing happened?"

"First of all, you say nothing happened, but then again, how do you know what did or didn't happen?"

"That's true, too. But don't you think your face is a little too cold for such a young girl?" ……. Wouldn't it be nice if you had a prettier face, or are you saying you're the daughter of a warlord, or something? You'd look ridiculous to us, arrogant."

"Yeah, I know, special treatment just because my dad's a martial artist! I can't believe it."

Countless negative thoughts from the deep darkness of the human mind flowed into the girl's head, polluting her fragile psyche. She was still young and unable to control her abilities. They may have thought they were whispering amongst themselves, but their dark thoughts had become a turbulent undercurrent, constantly flowing into her world.

It was no exaggeration to say that there was hardly a day that went by when she wasn't being stared at, always and everywhere, with malice in her eyes. Human jealousy had a terrifying negative undertone, and it was too much for her, still a child, to bear.

To make matters worse, the uncontrollable power of Long'an was amplifying the negative waves dozens of times over. The young girl's vessel was too small to contain it, and too much power could shatter it if she made a mistake. The girl's mind, like a clay vessel not yet dried by the sun, was about to collapse from the overwhelming influx of tainted minds. That's when the lion poisonous spirit appeared like a savior.

"Oh, you must be Yerin, I'm so glad to see you. I'm a poisonous spirit who will be your messenger from now on. Take care."

A white hand held out in front of him, a smile as bright as the sun, and that smile became the dawn, bringing the first light to a gray world.

Dokgo Ling sincerely complimented her on her beauty. Her special ability from a young age had always allowed her to recognize the truth and lies in people's words, even when they were unintentional. Although countless compliments were heaped upon her, it was mostly the dark emotions of humanity, named jealousy and lust, that lurked beneath the surface, hiding their poisonous teeth.

But there was not an ounce of selfishness in her words; she genuinely thought she was beautiful, deep down, and was admiring and blessing her for it.

For the first time, Na Yerin felt that it was okay to be perceived as beautiful by others. She also laughed genuinely at herself. No dirty lies dared to enter that laugh. When everyone else was denying her, she was affirming her.

For the first time in her life, Na Yerin felt envious of another person; she had something she didn't have, and it occurred to her that she might never have it.

-So I have gained one precious person whom I can sincerely call Unni.

It protected her as a child, a shield against the many inquisitions and jealousies. It provided a cool shade for the girl's wet bowl to dry without cracking. Without the shade, the delicate bowl would have dried quickly in the scorching sun and cracked like a rice paddy in a drought. It is impossible to express my gratitude in words. To Na Yerin, a poisonous spirit was more precious than her own flesh and blood, and now it had disappeared, its life and death unknown. It was impossible not to feel anxious and worried.

"My sister……."

Once again, a long sigh escaped her red lips. I felt like an idiot for not being able to do anything but let go of her hand and stand there.

And hated it.

* * *

As winter waned and spring came, the buds of life that had been huddled together in the bitter cold of winter began to stir and the world came alive, but for one woman, spring had yet to truly arrive. The sigh of a beautiful woman had the unique ability to break the hearts of many men at once, and not only that, but it also had the power to blur the seasons. All around, things were reviving, but the garden was still reeling from the chill of winter. Even now, it was showing unquestionable evidence of its effectiveness.

Then, in the garden of spring, where winter reigned, a woman broke into the garden of winter: a pure white robe, a scabbard obviously hewn from white jade, a white handle on the sword sheathed in it, dark eyes of profound wisdom, and an imposing prayer. Those men who insist that the phrase "overwhelming all men" should be reserved for the head of a company should be prepared to retract their foolish assertions the moment they see this woman. There are many attributions to this woman, and the odds are in favor of her, but there is only one who can exude such a presence in beauty. Embroidered on her chest is a six-winged flying white-hong sigil. The intruder was none other than Swordsman Yi Yuxiang, the first-ranked man of the Women's Middle Kingdom and Na Yerin's teacher.

Yi Yun frowned as he approached the garden where Na Yerin was. There were too many uninvited guests. Moreover, they were rudely hiding their faces, averting their gaze like thieves. Not that he'd have the nerve to introduce himself anyway.

"Twenty-three, no, twenty-five."

The two who managed to distract her, if only for a moment, deserve praise.

One of them was the "non-committal" perpetual honorary president of the Aes Sedai Society, but it wasn't necessary for a grizzled old man to be on top of the latest kinky trends.

They all looked up to the moon in the sky. None of them seemed to have the courage to touch it. She had no use for such aesthetics.

"That's ugly!"

Gumphu quipped.

She was not kind enough to overlook the group's ugliness. No, she was kind enough to make sure they didn't feel shame anymore.

Gum Hu rolled his foot once toward the ground.

Boom!

The invisible boundary spread out in all directions in concentric circles, like ripples on a lake. Soon, an invisible hemisphere was formed, covering ten sheets in all directions. This was the boundary of the sword Hu unfolded.

The boundary was in her mind, but the moment her mind contained that space, it transformed into an absolute space where everything happened exactly as her mind wanted it to happen. The implications of this fact were profound, though only for the sword, for it meant that everyone within the sword circle was as good as dead. That they were still breathing was either a mistake, or the mere whim of a woman, not a sign of their extraordinary abilities. There was no life within this circle that she could not kill at will, and she could control the life and death of every living thing within it without moving a single step.

But no one showed any reaction. Only one, Na Yerin, faltered. Her inability to react meant that her powers were at the level of a thousand and one, otherwise she could not have been so inert as to allow her own neck to be placed under the blade of another.

She let a bit of life flow into the sword circle she'd unfurled.

True (斬)!

It was only the life of her mind, but its power was terrifying. The intangible sword will stretched out in all directions, and in the next moment, her sword realm was under the control of death.

When the will was triggered, the Sword of the Heart - the Sword of the Heart - pierced the heart.

"Hmmm!"

Then all the unwelcome guests hiding among the trees jumped up like a flock of sparrows struck by lightning, and with an inelegant shriek, they fell from the hoodoo tree.

His mind had indeed cut them. The only difference was that they all cut their minds instead of their bodies. Although there were no physical wounds, the effect was profound, and the results were obvious. To an adept of her caliber, it didn't really matter if the wound was physical or not; sometimes a wound to the mind is more frightening and deadly than a wound to the body. It is not uncommon for a person to become dumb or insane if the wounds are severe enough. There are even cases where the mind is lost. In such cases, the body turns into a wooden doll that only breathes and no longer responds to any stimuli.

This time, however, I only cut it lightly to taste, so it ended up being more of an upsetting surprise.

The men were lying face down on the ground, their limbs flailing about like upturned zaras trying to move their paralyzed bodies. It was a sight to behold.

"Should we cut down all the trees so there's nowhere to hide?"

It is said that in the past there were no trees in the palace. It was a painstaking measure to prevent assassins from hiding, and it was more important to protect her than to protect the emperor. If the emperor dies, the prince will succeed him, but who will succeed the beautiful woman? Therefore, in terms of scarcity, shouldn't the beautiful woman be more important than the emperor?

"Ugly bastards!"

Gum Hu looked at the men squirming on the floor and spoke again.

"Go away, you don't deserve it!"

Like fish struck by lightning, the men who had been flopping around on the floor scrambled to their feet and disappeared with a snap. No man with a swollen liver dared to disobey her.

"You pathetic swarm of flies."

Swarms of tangled flies were dispatched with a single swipe, and Swordhu's assessment was colder than a northern windstorm. But that was before he looked at Na Yerin.

"Rhea, were you here?"

The expression on his face was softer than it had been when he was watching the flapping males.

"Your disciple, Na Yerin, comes to see you, Master."

Na Yerin greeted her, hastily removing her grief. But the sorrow was too deep and too thick to be wiped away in a moment.

"Tsk, tsk, where have you gone, only sadness? It's good to have emotions, because they enrich your life. But if you let them overtake you, they will destroy you."

Gum Hu knew that human emotions are like a calm lake that can suddenly turn into a massive tidal wave that swallows everything.

"There is sorrow after there is man, not after there is sorrow after there is man. Always try not to lose yourself."

"I will keep that in mind, Master."

But the student, who had yet to let go of his distrust of the world and lacked self-love, hadn't even established his own identity, which was why she had always asked questions to help him realize who he was. Now, however, her student was about to give in to another flurry of anxiety. She didn't know what she was supposed to do. And she hated herself for being so incompetent.

"Where was he at this crucial moment?

We decided it was dangerous to leave it as it was.

"Who are you?"

Gum Hu asked.

"I am your disciple."

Na Yerin replied.

"Then who are you that you are not a disciple of the sword?"

Gum Hu asked again.

"This is the Kudo of the Heavenly Martial Arts Center."

Gum Hu asked again.

"Who are you that you are not the Guandao of the Heavenly Martial Hall?"

After a moment's thought, Na Yerin replied.

"…the daughter of the Martial Lord Nabaxian."

"It's a simple relationship you have with yourself, not yourself with yourself, and while there are other martial artists in that relationship, there is no you, Na Yerin."

The father had a name, but the daughter had no name. Gum Hu paused for a moment, then spoke again.

"Do not try to reflect yourself in others. How can you reflect yourself in a mirror before you are yourself? Who are you that you are not a disciple of mine, not a disciple of Sword Hu, not a student of the Heavenly Martial Academy, not a daughter of the Martial Masters or Bai Chen? Are you saying that without these relationships you are nothing? Is there a mirror and then you are reflected in it, or is there you and then you are reflected in the mirror? Who are you?"

It was an intense question. Na Yerin had to answer it.

"What am I?

Having been trained to constantly establish herself in relationships, the idea of excluding them all was past her.

Who am I? What am I? How did I come into existence? Or rather, how is 'me' defined? Can I exist as me without all the relationships that are connected to me?

Then a voice rang in her ears, a voice brought to her by the reverberations of memory.

"How can you be so sure of yourself? I don't know… I think it's because you believe in yourself, and I'm pretty sure you believe in yourself. You are the only one who can decide who you are, and the creative act of defining who you are in this relative world is a right granted to you by neither the heavens nor the gods, but only by yourself. Relationships are just a secondary 'bonus' that comes after I am, nothing more, nothing less, a device for experiencing difference. The family, the organization, the nation, are all just venues for relationships, but they do not exist before me. No matter how much I try to mold or define myself around them, in the end, it is only I who decides who I am. To shirk responsibility at this point is not only a surrender of one's rights, but a foolish denial of one's very existence, for in that moment, man is reduced from freedom to bondage and becomes a puppet of others."

"Then how can I find myself, if I've already lost myself……?"

"You can't forget losing yourself, you just forget who you really are. Wouldn't it make you feel bad if you looked everywhere and everyone had the same face, the same face here, the same face there. Same outfit, same mindset, same way of talking, ewww - I feel sick just thinking about it. We've all been suffering from some kind of 'amnesia' since we were born, so don't you wonder who you were before you lost your memory?"

"So how do I wake up from that lucid dream, from that amnesia?"

"There are tons of ways to do it… but the easiest way is to set a real goal. You have to choose something first, and that's the beginning."

"Goals?"

"Yes, goals. The important thing about goals is to find out what you really want, and then goals will come naturally. Once you have that, you can figure out what path you need to take to get there. There are hundreds of millions, nay, infinite mountains of possibilities in this world, and you have to decide which one you want to climb first, so that you have a concrete path to get there. Wouldn't you hate to climb a mountain, get to the top, and be like, "Oh, wait, that's not the mountain!" when you've spent decades climbing that mountain?"

"I see, so Ryuyeon is so obsessed with money because her goal in life is to accumulate a lot of money and become rich?"

"Well, what do you think? I mean, sure, there are quite a few people who climb the mountain for the maximum amount of money, and that mountain is kind of crowded, but most of them pretend it's not. Well, it's not just those people, it's most of the people who climb the mountain for the backyard, so there's a lot of unexplored territory. Deciding which mountain you want to climb, and then climbing it, that's the first step to finding your true self, isn't it?"

"Egye, the first step, does that mean there's a second step?"

"Sure. Sure. That's why I said it's the easiest way to do it. There are a few more steps after that, and I haven't gotten to them yet, because it's like this thing goes on and on and on."

And one last question we can't forget.

"What mountain does Yerin want to climb?"

"ex……."

These are the words I spoke to Biyou one day. What did she say back then?

I remembered.

"My name is Na Yerin, and I am a swordsman, a strong man, a swordsman who pursues the path of the sword, and a woman."

Gum Hu was surprised by this clear answer from his student, not so much for its content as for the manner in which it was given, but for a glimpse of self-confidence he had not seen before. It was unclear whether she meant to acknowledge that she was not to be blamed for being a woman, or whether she meant that she was a man's woman, but he did not inquire.

"Let's save that for later.

"So you have agreed to live as a single swordsman in this mighty lake?"

"Yes, Master. I hate blood, but I enjoy chasing after the reason in the sword. I think I like the sword more than I realized, and now I find it hard to imagine myself away from it, or without learning how to use it."

Na Yerin's answer had the effect of tugging at her master's heartstrings and bringing tears to his eyes, but he didn't show it outwardly.

"What, then, is there that you can do now, except to grieve as a single swordsman?"

There was only one thing that a swordsman seeking the Way of the Sword could do.

"Would you like to try it for the first time in a long time?"

Sword Hu smiled and patted himself on the back.

"Are you talking to me, Master?"

"Yes. It's been a while since I've seen your accomplishments, and I didn't get a good look at them on the volcano thanks to that guy."

As a teacher of a child, I wanted to see the accomplishments of a student who had stepped out of his comfort zone, and this seemed like a good place to start.

"No thanks then."

"Of course. I completely refuse to accept any apologies here and now."

Na Yerin silently drew her sword. Sword Hu's sword remained at his waist, but he was still terrified. Whether the sword was in its scabbard, out of it, or not at all would have no effect on an adept of Sword Hu's caliber. Na Yerin knew better than anyone how swift her master's foot-swords were.

"Come in!"

Na Yerin remained silent, her sword still at the hilt, unmoved by Sword Hu's words. She knew full well that to thrust her sword at a master of Gum Hu's caliber would be tantamount to suicide. Impatience was a poison in this battle. Na Yerin stared calmly into his eyes.

For now, they were both one man swordsmen. I didn't have to say no.

All you had to do was hit it hard and prove yourself.

'indeed…….'

There was a glint in his eyes. Was it because he had regained some of his lost self? Standing silently, the disciple's sword looked much more stable than it had in the past. As a master, it was always a pleasure to see a student's progress.

But change never happens in a tightly wound perfect balance. Sword Hu slightly created a loophole in his body.

"……!"

An obvious provocation to poke when you can poke. And it was also a test.

As a disciple of Sword Fu, you should be able to handle such provocations. If one were to become too complacent, he would be met with unrelenting retribution. But he couldn't help but hesitate.

By the time she reaches the peak of her powers, her loopholes are like the moon: they can be seen but not grasped. Nevertheless, because it is visible, it seduces the viewer. It didn't matter if she was aware of it or not. It was better to have a goal than to have no goal. Na Yerin reached out with all her might to grasp the moon. It was the first step of the Violet Sword. It wasn't fancy, but it was fast, accurate, and easy to react to when it didn't work. His opponent was a woman. She didn't expect to lose in a single move, but her expectations were far off.

Boom!

With a swift thrust, Na Yerin's blade pierced the sword hood's heart. Na Yerin's eyes widened in shock. She had already planned the next five moves, thinking that she would be able to dodge them, but now this happened……. Even with her dragon eyes, she hadn't anticipated this at all.

But it was too early to be alarmed. In the next moment, the pure white snowflakes that had been scattered by Sword Hu's newcomer had scattered and disappeared before her eyes, as if scattered by the north wind.

"Where are you looking?"

It was in her ear that she heard the soft voice of the swordsman. Before she knew it, she had gotten behind her apprentice and was whispering in her ear. Na Yerin turned around in surprise. She was speechless with astonishment.

Seeing the bewildered expression on his disciple's usually icy face, Sword Hu's heart was extremely satisfied.

"It's called a flying snowstep. It's called that because when it's cast, it looks like scattered snow. It's actually my name. I made it, so I deserve a name."

"Non-snowfall……."

Na Yerin silently mouthed the name and tried to recite it. It felt good.

"Yeah, don't you think it's a lot better than a ghost walk? It maximizes the effect of an afterimage. I assume you know the difference between an alter ego and an afterimage?"

"Yes, Master. But I don't think that would happen with the afterimage alone."

Gum Hu chuckled at his apprentice's point.

"You sure have a sharp eye. I wasn't going to share this with you because it's a trade secret, but I can't help it. It's actually an afterimage effect on an alter ego. It's an afterimage that flashes to the left and right at the same time, confusing the optic nerves and making it appear to disappear like a blur. This is a technique that even your lion has not yet learned."

"The chi that not even the dingo lion learned……."

She's trying to pass it on to herself first. Na Yerin looked straight at Sword Hu and said.

"Then I can't learn either, because if the lion can't learn, how can I learn first?"

"You are worthy of learning this chi. That's why I'm giving you this vision. Of course, the Anima deserves to learn it, too. But he is not here now, is he?"

"Ha, but……."

Gum Hu raised his hand to interrupt her.

"For a great ship to float, water must be piled high, and for a phoenix to soar ninety thousand leagues above the heavens, wind must be piled ninety thousand leagues thick. Without a thick layer of water, there is no power to carry a large ship, and without a thick layer of wind, there is no power to carry a large ship. Without the accumulated merit, you will be powerless. If you truly want to save the ling'er, build up your own skills so that you can respond when she needs your abilities. Don't you want to avoid the misery of not being able to fly when you want to fly?"

Her voice was quiet, but it carried the weight of a thousand muscles, and her words were part of an ancient, millennia-old teaching.

"Learn it, so you won't be worse off. Besides, who knows when you'll need it? You must always be ready. Time does not wait. Only those who are prepared will be able to catch it when it whizzes by them like an arrow. This chi will come in handy, even if it is only to help the spirit. If the child is in such danger that he cannot get out of it by his own power, will it not take more than that to get him out of it? So learn it and become skilled at it, for too much of a good thing is not always a good thing."

"The disciple's thinking was short, please teach this poor pupil."

Na Yerin said, bowing politely. Swordhu smiled benevolently at his apprentice's willingness to admit his mistake and make amends so quickly.

"By the way, this master has one question for you."

"Please do."

In a polite tone, Na Yerin replied.

"The… child. Did I mention that she's called Bi Ryuyeon?"

"……!"

For a moment, Na Yerin's body visibly shook. Sword Hu found that amusing.

'I can't believe that a name alone can agitate this child this much……. something even I couldn't do…….'

He was the only human to accomplish the feat of making an ice sculpture smile.

The more I learned about her, the more I couldn't help but be curious about this unknown person.

"Do you know anything about the child's affairs?"

Na Yerin shook her head.

"No. I don't know, except that I'm from Sichuan."

'Sichuan…….'

That was too broad a scope. How many sects are there in Sichuan?

"It's going to be hard for you later if you have a lot of identity differences, so who cares?"

"What do you mean, me, later?"

Suddenly, the future she hadn't envisioned was retroactively changed, and she panicked.

"No, you didn't think of that, because you're still a martial artist. Other girls would have already started families……."

Something heavy settled on Na Yerin's chest.

"Well, I've never thought about it that way, and I don't intend to for the foreseeable future. Marriage? No way."

Marriage… the word she thought was the least relevant to her life and future. Marrying someone was something she'd never imagined, two words that had no place in her life, in her life.

"Well, you'd better start thinking about it now, because there's a saying about having no money left over."

It seemed a little different, but she didn't argue; she was a polite student.

"A man's life is a thing of change, whenever and wherever it may be; it is as imprecise as it is varied as it is imprecise; and there will come a time when we shall have to think of it. So, as for his status……."

Having given his disciple a tremendous mental jolt, Sword Hu went back to where he wanted to bury himself.

"Ryuyeon is not the kind of person to care about that."

Na Yerin replied sharply, which surprised the swordsman twice. He was surprised once by its decisiveness and twice by its expression.

'I can't believe how casually this kid said a man's name…….'

Knowing her from the past, I was even more surprised. It was just a tease, but it might actually lead to an unprecedented event. What position should I take? She thought long and hard about it.

"Even if you don't care, won't your father care?"

"Even if he did, he wouldn't care, because that's the kind of person Ryuyeon is."

"Ho-ho, you mean to tell me you're that good, that you can't be stopped by the Great Forest Blindness?"

"That's the kind of person she is. She's not someone who cares about other people's status."

Upon hearing the same answer from his disciple, Sword Hu sighed lightly.

"I can't tell if it's total trust or desperation, and I'm afraid you're going to have a lot of trouble in the future. Your father may not know it, but your mother won't take it lying down."

Na Yerin's mother was very sensitive to such things. Just because they didn't care, the social norms that were already fossilized were not going to let them off the hook.

"I may have unceremoniously notarized a marriage between the two of you on a volcano, but while my notarization may work for your father, I'm not sure it will work for your mother."

Word of her notarization will spread throughout the Jianghu faster than the wind, and will probably soon reach the ears of Nabaxian and his wife. He would have to save himself from the fiery wrath of his wife.

"Your father may not object to my appearance. But your mother will not. She's never been one for such things. Besides, she's your parent. She deserves a say in her child's future. I may be your teacher, but will I have to take that away from you?"

Ryu-yeon Bi would definitely have something to say about this. If you don't trust your child's decisions and try to mold their future, you're not going to make them happy, you're only going to make them unhappy. If you stop a baby bird from leaving the nest on its own, it loses the opportunity to train its wings, and its fragile wings will one day be broken by a strong wind and fall to the ground. But Na Yerin hasn't gone that far yet.

"That's a long way off, Master."

"I don't know. We'll see. The arrow of time never stops, which is both an advantage and a disadvantage. They sneak up on you without making a sound and threaten you. By the way, what's he been up to lately? I haven't seen him anywhere. I've been meaning to have a word with him, but I don't get the chance."

As she did so, she consciously or unconsciously tugged at her bindings. Apparently the white thing around her waist, which was too elastic and slender for her age, had something to do with the 'conversation' she was having.

"Well, from what I've heard, you're busy with your students. They're in a crash course."

"Disciple? How old is a disciple?"

"I said, 'There is such a thing, it's like playdates.'"

She didn't really know any more than that. And even if she did, she wasn't the type to ask. In the first place, she was a person who was extremely lacking in interest in others. Perhaps that's why she was said to be like a cold blade of ice. A beautiful but extremely cold sword light.

"Where did you pick up the little ones?"

If she had heard it, she might have said, "Something like that.